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It’s been 6 days since my last blog. The last week has been filled with ups and downs, but the positive you have to take from crap like this is what you can learn from it I think, or something similar like that I think I saw on instagram. Here’s what I’ve learned this week:

1) Rugby girls know how to party – On Saturday we won our last home game of the league this season and proceeded to get very messy, at the club then out in town. It was my first proper sesh out with the ladies and it was such a good night out. I can say this enough to anyone who might be feeling a little lonely or stuck in a rut, get out there and join a team. Maybe not Rugby,it’s not everyone’s bag but the amount of support these ladies show to each other is phenomenal. We played drinking games that I have never come across in all my life never having been in a team or off to uni, everyone kept an eye on each other and I got to know some people much better, it was a belter, drank more than I have in years, I was impressed at my own stamina!!!

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2) Nothing can replace chocolate. At the end of today I will be 18 days chocolate free if you do not include my cock up four days in (see my last post). On Sunday I woke up in bed with Mr T #winner and with a stonking headache after the big team night out. I proceeded to spend my Sunday scoffing through as much as possible to banish my hangover and satisfy some cravings. Me and Mr T went for a burrito which was beautiful as usual, then we headed to Sainburys where I picked up all kinds of crap. Tea on Sunday evening was these sugar glazed bad boys. 

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Since Sunday my entire week has not been very weightwatchers friendly. I managed to stay on track with my daily points all day Tuesday and Wednesday but for the rest of the week I’ve been looking for solace in the rest of the bakery section that is not materialising.

I feel like chocolate is the only thing that will scratch the itch, but at the same time I am determined to beast lent this year. I need a new strategy for the next week. Weigh in on Monday is a great chance to start over and do some planning. Work has been running at 50% staff for the last two weeks, this week I know it used so much of my energy that I spent my evenings needing sugar and some peace and quiet. I managed to drag myself to step class on Wednesday but that’s as much as I can report exercise wise, pretty shameful for someone who is meant to run 10K in August.

Today my excuse is that I’m Carbing up for Rugby tomorrow which is why me and Mr T ended up in the burrito place again. It’s strange how fast you get used to a good thing though. The first time T introduced me to Go Burrito I struggled to finish one… now we’re in and out in twenty minutes and I’m wondering what I can have for dessert. Having Burrito gives me an excuse to use this though….

Imagemmmmm yes Sir!

3) Women are powerful. When pictures of slap free ladies starting showing up on my Facebook feed I have to confess to rolling my eyes and thinking FFS what is this??? The next douchebag thing to replace those daft Necknominations right?! By the next morning I had been tagged in four nominations, my Facebook friends and family are not stupid people so I figured it was something worth taking a look at.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-26683817

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Over 2 million pounds raised in just a couple of days is incredible, even if you disagree with the means of achieving it for vanity reasons you can’t argue with how much good that money will do. I jumped on the bandwagon, sent my text, posted my picture and nominated one of my blog followers too.

As a result of this I also checked my boobs, and if you’re reading and haven’t seen the campaign or didn’t fancy joining in, please have a little feel of yourself for me, that includes guys too, please put your hands down your pants at my request http://www.breakthrough.org.uk/about-breast-cancer/touch-look-check?gclid=CJ65jYGXp70CFWXnwgodD1oA3A

and finally something I have learnt and maybe knew for a while but am not pleased to admit…

4) I have feelings for Mr T.

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Not this version of Mr T, but my Mr T, so called because he’s a teacher. In short if you haven’t read the previous blogs, after coming out of a 4 year relationship in June Mr T became my fuck buddy around November/December of last year. I thought I would give him a cool nickname so that I could juggle various men and they could all have their own little codes and stories. Turns out I am crap at playing the field, my town is too small, and although I have had other offers seeing Mr T is more than enough for me to handle.

He’s gorgeous, intelligent and an amazing fuck, neither of us need a boyfriend or girlfriend at this juncture in our lives so things have been ticking over great(ish). The problems always occur when one or both of us is drunk and usually say something we don’t mean,however on Thursday night T took this to a new extreme. He called at 2.37am precisely when I had to be up at 6.30 for work the next day (bad move already) asked to come round and got denied, which lead to the biggest toddler style strop I have ever seen in my life. He told me he could not give a fuck about me, and then while on the phone to me, told me he had found someone else to go home with instead 😮  I was wide awake and absolutely fuming by this point!!!! Up until 4am after that and by the time I had simmered down from the rage I realised I was actually a bit upset.

The next day he came back grovelling, took me out for drinks, bought me stuff and apologised, not just on a text but in person too which is sometimes hard to do. He didn’t sleep with anyone else, but I genuinely have no ownership over the boy. The fact I have these feelings now probably means we should be calling things off. It definitely means I’ve got myself invested in him when I tried not to, and it means I stand to lose something more than just sex now when he moves off to something else. It’s a shitty choice to have to make, cut ties now or end up gutted later, I don’t like it one bit, put it to the back of my mind last night and he came over after the pub. When we had sex this morning he came inside me properly for the first time and when we locked eyes it was one of the deepest orgasms I’ve ever had…I haven’t been able to shake it off all day. 

Life is never bloody simple is it?!

 

Thanks for reading 

ALOT 

xxxx